Confessions

Just had a few things I wanted to get off my chest...

• One of my earliest childhood memories was packing my doll's bag with all her clothes and 'running away' across Tumbler Ridge to go to my Nana's because 'Mommy yelled at me'.

• I grew up 'trailer trash' at it's finest. My mom used to manage a trailer park in Tumbler Ridge.

• I grew up around cars, could almost say I was raised on a stock car track, but driving terrifies me.

• I was very precocious child -- so was my best friend/boyfriend, Kyle Beattie, who lived in the cul-de-sac a block away. We used to steal Penthouse magazines from my dad's shop, and go to our tree fort where we'd pretend I was his shackled up 'Love Goddess'. I was like 6. My parents also caught us in the backseat of my dad's truck in our skivvies, and my mom chased him home in his briefs.

• Once, my Uncle Doug and I were on his speedboat on the Shuswap Lake, and I accidentally lost my Aunt's favorite coffee mug. She still doesn't know it was me. She thought her Cocker Spaniel, Zippy, carried it away from the campsite.
  

• Once, at a high school dance, my friend Corey told my high school crush, KC, to ask me to dance, so he did. We danced to RHCP's 'Californication' and I still haven't parted with the dress I wore that night.

• I dated a popular guy in high school that I wasn't even mildly attracted because I wanted a really popular boyfriend, and he dumped me the next day because we weren't in the same social circles.
  

• When I was about 14 years old, I was completely plagued by self doubt, and was sure I needed to be skinnier than my current 110 lbs in order to get more guys, so I contemplated becoming bulimic. The first time I ate a meal, and then retired to the bathroom to puke it out, wasn't successful at all. I kneeled over the toilet for an insane amount of time, until my mom knocked at the door and asked me to use an air freshener when I came out, since that could be the only reason I'd be in the WC for as long as I was.

• My mom found out I was smoking while I was in my bedroom on the phone with a guy I had a huge crush on. He and I didn't speak again, until almost 4 years later when I drunkenly fell into his lap at the bar in my hometown. His smile still made me melt.

• I dumped a really nice guy because he talked about himself too much, but I think I'd be devastated if my boyfriend pointed out the obvious to me.

• I once made out with my roommate because the guy I was dating failed to call when he said he would. It felt like cheating then, but I know it wasn't. It's the closest I've ever come, though.

• I slept with my old landlord's grandson in the basement suite I rented from them, after watching 'The Return of the King' with him at the theatre.. he was 3 years my junior.

• Last February, I was in Calgary for a dog show and in the middle of the night, Summer and my roommate's Sharpei, Ruga, got into it over the water dish. Summer ripped a hole in Ruga's face, and we had to take her in for stitches the next morning before the show. I lied and told Dickhead Wayne I paid for the entire thing and couldn't pay rent until my next paycheque. I actually spent my money on dog show stuff.

• The year I moved back to my hometown, my friend Corey got his own apartment and he had a housewarming party. Not only did I drunkenly admit to my ex boyfriend, Craig, that I wanted to shag Corey so I'd know what it felt like, but it was the first time I ever did Ecstasy.

• My first job was at a gas station in the middle of nowhere, and my coworkers and I would sometimes get stoned behind the building and eat junk food from the store without expensing anything. I guess that's what you get for having a bunch of punk kids running your store.
  

Good Puppies Like Good Shoes

My puppy has a shoe fetish that might possibly rival mine. I let the brats sleep loose last night as opposed to in their crates and I woke up to a floor covered in platforms and stilettos.

At least he'll grow up knowing how intrinsic shoes really are to the female psyche. It'll be a refreshing change to have a man in my life who appreciates a good shoe.

Summer has taken to lounging on the bottom half of the bed, and gloating over the fact that there 'no more room' for Lincoln. In actuality I sleep in a condensed fetal position, and with her warming my feet there's plenty of room for the puppy. He'll realize it soon enough. And then I'll need to upgrade to a larger bed if I ever hope to have the company of a biped bed-mate.

It's been a Year???

So my friend Phil calls me tonight to let me know he won't make it down to see me as he's currently incapacitated at Clayton's birthday, and it dawns on me.. one year ago today I was hugging a bottle of rye to my chest and crying on my dining room floor while Tracy coached me to get up and move on.

For any new readers, here's the lowdown. No, it's not an entry from the day in question, but read from about halfway down the entry and I think it explains it beautifully.

I know it's twisted, but still.. Happy Anniversary to me!

Now.. where's my rye?

Winter and Such

Winter is here, folks.

I closed a tad early tonight in hopes that I could catch the early bus, but alas, I missed it be mere seconds.

Rather than staying outside in the bitter weather for 15 minutes, I opted to grab something warm from Tim's, but once I got back outside, wasn't sure whether it was the cup giving off sufficient warmth for my hand or whether I'd just dumped hot coffee on myself. Turns out it was the latter, and for anyone familiar with the lava-like temperature their coffee is, I think this speaks for itself.

What is up with people losing their minds once the temperature drops subzero?

On the way to work, my bus driver turned down the street heading back towards my place, instead of continuing on down Stony Plain Rd. and didn't realize his error until a little elderly lady stood up to point it out. Slamming on his brakes, the poor thing just about took a headlong dive out the windshield. Once he got back on Stony, he zipped right past 3 people standing at the busstop without even a second glance.

I think the vast majority of us really WANTED to say something, but I realize apathy is abundant in the city especially when everyone is concerned with their own personal time schedules.

And waiting for the bus this evening.. I see it turn the corner to head towards me at about the same time I really conversationally involved couple walks past me. As it pulls over at the stop a block down, they quickly race to catch it there instead of turning around and patiently waiting for it at the bus stop they'd just passed.

So there I stood, in the cold, with my coffee waiting for the bus that just waited for these two brainless morons to reach that stop.

I'm not bitter though, I'm actually in a great mood. I have ABBA playing, my Christmas tree is decorated, Lincoln is running around with a jingle bell collar and I have pasta boiling on the stove. Life is good, except I think I'm coming down with something.

'Tis the season.. tra la la la.

Cruel and Unusual Punishment

Yeah.. I'm one of those

Sunday Bloody Sunday

Where the hell does the weekend go?

I mean aside from the fact that I was up until about 5 this morning playing Mall Tycoon (FYI, now have a mall rivaling West Ed full dress with stores paying notorious rent and charging customers up the Wahoo.. truly am meant to be a tycoon, methinks), my weekend appears to have slipped through my fingers somewhere between me, err, chatting, and -- sleeping?

I honestly can't think of one really interesting thing I did all weekend.

Well ok -- I think the reason my sim mall is doing so amazingly is because I wandered around the real thing for about 4 hours yesterday with Ryan. I think the purpose was to go Christmas shopping, but I came home with a paltry 2 gifts for other people and the Clone High Box set for myself. I really have to stop doing that. :S

I'm stumped for presents for my brother, Trinity. When asked what he wanted for Christmas, he responded with, 'A job, black hair dye and a car'. Hmmm.

I saw a black AFI hoodie that I knew he'd really like, but unfortunately they only went up to XL. Damn anorexic emo kids.

Just like any other 18 year old boy, he'd also like an X Box 360 or a new cell phone.. but since I'm on a 'tight' (ie. broke ass) budget, I'm officially stumped.

Tonight I am bound and determined to forget about work tomorrow and enjoy myself. Despite the Freudian slip the marketing suits at Mickey D's just pulled, I'm still craving a Big Mac. Maybe a nap. But I really did want to decorate for Christmas tonight.

However.. the nap seems easiest.

So much for enjoyment.

Preconceived Notions

Just before I pop off to go snuggle with the puppies and read the copy of The Da Vinci Code that Wayne lent me (wonderful book by the way, I'm incredibly intrigued, although admittedly I am a complete pop culture whore!) I had a quick (PROMISE!) story and piece of wisdom to impart to everyone.

I got home from work today and started talking to this girl Syn who is on my MSN list.

Syn is a single mom of an adorable 4 year old girl, she has two dogs and trains dogs in her spare time, and is a very witty and intelligent person to talk to. We ended up talking for over an hour tonight.

Syn is also Bad Wayne's ex girlfriend -- prior to me, after Kristie (ex wife).

Now I know I should have known this already, based on what Kristie told me the night we confronted him in Mill Woods in the spring, but from now on, I take what people tell me about someone with a grain of salt. I will draw my own conclusions. More people should.

Also, we made a mutual decision to abbreviate him to DHW (=Dickhead Wayne) to differentiate him from 'Good Wayne', who is still good.

PS. Good Wayne.. you're a bum. Where's the post I asked for?

My Letter to Someone

I've known you for years, you've seen me at my worst, at my best and when it's just any other day. I talk to you about my deepest secrets, fear, wishes and hopes. I'm sure you think I'm neurotic somedays, and sometimes you don't understand what I'm mad about, but you love me all the same.

You listen to me ramble incessantly for hours, and I know you get bored with it, but you've always been good about feigning interest. I appreciate it.

Together we've been through so many highs and lows, and you've always stuck with me throughout mine. I always hope I can do the same by you.

There are times I view you as a nuisance, and think getting rid of you would alleviate some of my problems and grant me more freedom in my life, but I want to be a person of stronger moral fibre than that. Instead of the simple decision I think it is, I know in the long run it would cause me more pain and heartache than the free time would be worth. Besides, I think having you around makes me a better person. I'd miss you more everyday.

You have the gentlest of souls, and your simplicity is beautiful, but deceiving because I know there is more under the surface. I know you have thoughts and hopes and dreams and together I'm sure we'll achieve them together....










To my 'daughters of choice', Onye and Summer.



---------

Ok, I know most of you are rolling your eyes, but I really have to admit that I never give my furkids enough credit.

Summer puts up with me when most people (my mom included) would tell me to 'shut up, calm down and come back when you make sense'.

Onye's put up with everything. Being up and moved every 6 months to a year. The introduction of Dog #1 (Reba), Dog #2 (Summer), Dog # (Nik) and now Dog #4 (Lincoln). The dumb road trip idea Tobi and I had one fall. And on and on and on.

I love my kids, and I just wanted everyone to see why.

When Telecommunications became the enemy

When you're in the line of work that I am, you'll find that you have a damn good reason to hate the phone. I spend 85% (well, on a good I-feel-like-really-working day) of my day on the phone, calling people who apparently believe I'm the business of GIVING away money.

After hearing voicemail greeting after voicemail greeting, and sometimes those obnoxiously monotone 'Please-Leave-Message-After-Tone' prompts, not only does your right ear develop small callouses, but you start to realize that you can call some people 3 times a day, and leave messages ranging from emergency mode 'Call me back ASAP' to unimpressed 'Call me back before 8 tonight, please' and they're likely just sitting at home glancing at their caller ID going, 'Yeah, like I'll ever call YOU back'.

Then I can't help but think back to when I was 16 years old, and the phone was the only thing making my angst-ridden existence bearable. Well, ok, so maybe I still have a melodrama hangover from those 7 years, but all the same, it's funny how extreme my views have become on the sound of a ringing phone from then to now.

Once considered one of the hugest pick-me-ups in my life, I now groan in agony unless it's someone I might actually enjoy conversing with at length.

And I've become one of 'THOSE'.. the dreaded SCREENER. The phone rings and I stare at it blankly for a second.

423-8690... do I know that number? I don't think I know that number. Why is there no name attached? How am I supposed to know if I want to talk to 423-8690 if they don't even let me know who's calling.

So I let it ring the perfunctory 4 times before voicemail kicks in and promptly check my messages a minute later and realize I'm so happy I didn't pick up when it's another prospective employer calling to setup an interview that will likely interfere with my time spent at home, umm -- cleaning?

Nope.

Doing yardwork?

Negative.

Chatting online?

Much more likely.

And I put the name and number in an agenda that exists only in my mind, and that I may one day wish wasn't so imaginary, and think, maybe.

Now I think, how did I survive my entire life without the wonderful technology of voicemail and caller ID?


Also.. when did my body start hating me and caffeine so much?

I needed a pick-me-up when I started this morning, and 2 more of those later, and I feel like my insides are twisted in agony and even more tired than I was before.

Thank God I get to go do nothing at home in an hour.

PS. I think I may be coming slightly blog addicted, but just to let a certain someone know that it is slightly intentional. I know car trouble is an issue right now, but please give me some work-time reading so I can stop boring the poor people who stumble on my page with the incessant ramblings and such of my dreadfully dull existence. Thanks dear!

What NOT to do in an interview

So I had an interview yesterday that I think I might have mentioned. I didn't go into much detail but suffice it to say that by the time I made it in to the office of the HR girl I had completely made up my mind what a complete waste of time this was. Except I really did need to go downtown to renew my pet licenses, and get a new tag for Onye.

Anyway.. herein are the reasons why I think she dropped my resume in the trash:

I told her one of my biggest qualities is that I take too much on myself, and also consider that one of my biggest drawbacks, as I stared outside the window. When she responded (in a voice very stereotypically chipper and HR girl-ish), 'That was the next question I was going to ask'. I muttered, 'Yeah, it's not my first dance, I'm not exactly new at this', and then told her my second biggest quality is that I'm a very positive person and can always see the the 'upbeat, err, optimistic side of things' and then raised my eyebrown and glared at Tyler, who was leaning against the doorframe, with a big grin on his face.

Tyler also mentioned I dated his roommate, I assume the HR girl realizes the roommate is Joel, the man who quit Garda because he hated their policies.

And the final reason I believe she garbaged my C.V. as soon as I was out of sight:
On the application under, 'What interests you most about this position?', I wrote, "I don't remember applying for it, that's interesting".

She said she'd keep my resume on file, and I told her I'd still be interested in a part time dispatch position on evenings and weekends. I figured they were both big enough lies to counteract each other.

Oh, the joys of being proactive.

What is this 'motivation' you speak of?

So today I had two job interviews, and for once I actually made it to one of them. Don't get me wrong.. I'm not a slacker, I don't lack drive and I'm not lazy...

It's just that lately.. I don't feel as motivated to do anything work related as I used to. It seems like every day that I go into work I feel like a small part of me is dying. Yet, I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place knowing my holidays are booked off at Christmas, and chances are slim to none that if I get a new job I'll get a week off after working there less than a month. So as I now tell prospective employers.. I'm looking for something sometime in the New Year. I think a definitive idea of when I'm available, and the fact that I'm being proactive about looking for something in a month looks good on my part. Or something.

The interview I hit up today is actually the company Joe used to work at.. yes.. that Joe. His roommate and former coworker Tyler is now the Operations Manager, and while Ty and I have always kept in contact and on good terms, it's still extremely awkward to see him in a professional capacity and office setting, as opposed to coming out of the bathroom in his boxers at 9 on a Saturday morning, grinning because their goddamn walls are paper thin.

Anyway, he was really cool with me being there to interview, I think he got sort of a kick out of it honestly. I could have done without him leaning against the door frame nonchalantly eavesdropping on the interview though. :)

I bombed it, anyway. Not that I really care.. God knows I don't remember sending them my resume, anyway. Although when you're randomly hitting the submit button through teary eyes, pissed because you think your company has been jilting you, stupid things happen.

Little man and I have handling classes tonight. It's basically just an excuse for me to pay $5 to go play with puppies for an hour. I'm still excited.

Anyways.. things to do.

Makes sense now...

Your Birthdate: October 29

You have the mind of an artist, even if you haven't developed the talent yet. Expressive and aware, you enjoy finding new ways to share your feelings. You often feel like you don't fit in - especially in traditional environments. You have big dreams. The problem is putting those dreams into action. Your strength: Your vivid imagination Your weakness: Fear of failure Your power color: Coral Your power symbol: Oval Your power month: November

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Yay.. more nothing!

So a friend of mine got me addicted to more stupid stuff to do while I'm NOT working at work. Honestly though, who actually works when they're scheduled on a Sunday?

I suppose the premise of the idea is that some guy got laid off and started a website, and now he's got these absolutely hilarious cartoons about the monotony of being one of the unwashed masses of the unemployed. I've been there.. it's a funny situation. Except there's no money, not so funny.

Check it out:



It gave me a little hope though, in case anyone at Corporate HO discovers what I actually do on their clock, though. Maybe I could start a website, except -- I remember I'm not funny.

Oh well... corporate drone it is.

Hello, my name is Bridgit -- I'll be calling your bluff today

Had an interesting conversation last night --

Have you ever ran into an ex, or chatted with them a few months after the breakup and you feel like you're trying to shove some facade of your sunshine-y new life, sans them, down their throat to make them sorry they lost you?

You try to sound believable, and usually come out of the conversation feeling slightly deflated and like a complete loser.

I'm guilty of this in the past with several exes. Either work is going great and I got a great raise/promotion, or the new guy I'm seeing is the perfect man or I just got this great place or something stupid. It's just something I've always done to cope with a particularly awkward situation.. I call it the 'My-Life-Without-You Rocks!' syndrome, and I got to be at the receiving end last night.

A guy I was seeing over the summer happened to pop onto MSN today, and since I haven't talked to him since the ominous 'end of things' I decided to IM him a quick hello to let him know there were no hard feelings.

As follows.. our conversation.. I've changed his name out of courtesy. For brevity purposes, GUY is him. (Text in purple and brackets is just my interjections)

Me - Hi GUY, how are ya?
GUY- fine GUY - rich and feelin happy
Me - Sweet
Me - You been out at camp then?
GUY - on the rigs... a motor man i make 35 an hour and make close to 9000 a month (Here's where my suspicions start to arise.. Bullshit lie #1)
GUY - my girlfriend is very happy (Can't help but giggle.. it's a poor attempt at trying to stir jealousy in me, unfortunately I'm off the firm frame of mind it's either Bullshit lie #2 or him bragging about his gold digging new girl, either way.. still funny)
Me - Oh yeah? My friend Matt is on motors.
Me - Which outfit? :)
GUY - Ensign.....
GUY - im off for a couple of days..... but i have to go
Me - Nice.. ditto
GUY - my tattoo appointment is in an hour (tat appointment at 10 pm?)
Me - Ciao

First things first.. Matt and I just had a really candid conversation not 2 weeks ago about what we make, and $35/hr is what a Driller makes an hour.. not a motor man. They make considerably less. Also.. if Ensign paid $35/hr to start, even the most loyal of employees would leave their outfits to work there.. especially if they had experience.

#2 - A new guy getting hired straight into a Motor man position? With a starting wage of $35/hr?

#3.. for as long as I've known GUY, he's never struck me as mechanically inclined in the least -- obviously a must for a guy working motors on the rigs.

#4 - I've been around the dating game long enough to know that when an ex volunteers that they have a girlfriend right off the bat without being asked, and stressed that their S.O. is quite happy, it's a ploy. The girlfriend.. always fictional.


Anyway.. I've learned my lesson.. this sort of overcompensation just makes you look like a hurting, dishonest fool.. never again will I make this mistake.

Blogthings... I'm so bored

Popular Kid

In high school, everyone knew your name - even if you didn't know theirs. In fact, your still skating by on your looks and charm. Nothing wrong with that!

Who Were You In High School?

You Are a Normal Girl

You are 40% Good and 60% Bad. Sure you've pulled some bad girl stunts in your past.But these days, you're (mostly) a good girl.

Are You a Good Girl or a Bad Girl?

You Are A Lily

You are a nurturer and all around natural therapist.People see you as their rock. And they are able to depend on you.You are a soothing influence. You can make people feel better with a few words.Your caring has more of an impact than even you realize.

What Flower Are You?

Guys Like That You're Fun

You're the type of girl guys brag about knowingThat's because you're cool, funny, and laid backYou're smart enough to know how to be one of the guysBut flirty enough to know how to make them all want you

What Do Guys Like About You?

What Age Am I?

You Are 25 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Goodbye Madonna

So I got word today that I won't be transferring to the new branch until December some time. I think that will all work out for the best since I'm planning on dropping my notice with this company and starting something new January 1st anyway. I think that's the best course of action since I already have my holidays booked off for a week surrounding Christmas, and I can start work when everyone else is dropping the jobs they just kept to have Christmas money.

Also, it's doesn't leave Tammy in a lurch, since she'll have a new employee who will be fully trained by then anyway, and then Emilia, being as close to Renee as she is, shouldn't have any problems finding a new and competent staff member. I feel like crap leaving them shortstaffed in January, but hey, it seems we've been running with less than fully staffed branches since I started with this company over a year ago.

You're probably wondering what the title of this blog has to do with anything in my life, but I got the cutest compliment today from a longtime client. He came in, and was looking at me and then at my desk and finally piped up, and said something I misinterpreted as 'Where is my donut?'

This gentleman has a very STRONG accent, and I'm sure I looked beyond confused wondering why a man holding a Tim Horton's cup in his hand would be asking ME for a donut, until he finally asked his again and gestured at my desk. "The girl over there -- Madonna".

I realized that the last time this customer saw me I was dressed up in my 80's best with wild peacock blue eyeshadow, a full mane full of crimped locks heavily sprayed with Aquanet and a bright yellow blazer/miniskirt combo with shoulder pads that made me look like a Lions linebacker.

I blushed... who could help it?

"You looked just like Madonna," he says, "Very very pretty".

After processing the docs he heads towards the door, stops, blows me a kiss.

"Goodbye Madonna"

Oh.. it's good to be back. ;)

Must have been a beautiful baby!

I'm a mommy, again!

Not in the sense that I bore a child of my own loins, no, but tonight I brought home the most precious little since my now adult furbaby, Summer.

His name is Lincoln, or rather Debalys Lincoln Navigator, and he's a 9 week old Siberian Husky male who is going to be my new show dog. Already the little monster has bone structure to die for, a wonderful personality, attitude and wonderful movement, so I have no doubts in my mind that he is going to be a fantastic show dog.

Summer's not so thrilled about having to share me with her playful nephew, but I think it'll be good for her to have him around, and he's such a dear that I think she'll like the idea of a dog for company as opposed to the vindictive feline
companion she currently has, who FYI, pissed on Frank's bed today in a fit of protest about my being gone.

My Lord.. why are my pets such sucks????

Anyway, it's nearing one in the morning, and my week stress leave is now up. Back to the grind tomorrow at noon. *sigh*

Does Size Really Matter?

So if the average size of a guy's *ahem* member, is right around 5-7 inches when erect, does having a larger than average one place a man at an advantage, or are there more women in the world, who like me, think that as long as it's a sufficient length and *giggle* girth, the actual size is irrelevant?

I've always been more with the line of thinking that it's what a man can do with it, rather than whether or not I choke on it during penetration. Not to say someone who is painfully lacking in that department should be completely complacent in this knowledge. He should also have the knowledge/experience to back it up.

I'm a tad ashamed (although secretly pleased) to be a woman of some comprehensive experience, and from this experience I know
personally that the larger they are, the more painful it has the capacity to be. As I once explained to a friend, when I was more than just slightly inebriated.. if you put a Ferrari Engine in a Dodge Colt, you're bound to 'bend the frame'.

My conclusion? Don't believe the hype.. be comfortable with your imperfections and give your partner ample opportunity to overlook your little (no pun intended) flaws by keeping them happy in other areas.

FYI.. I was just really bored today.

Fivers

10 years ago I was: Being your typical 12 year old girl, playing with Barbies, my new puppy (who's now geriatric), and still trying to pretend boys were yucky when in truth, I had crushes on anyone mildly attractive.

5 years ago I was: In grade 12.. I was 17, and going through one of the most tumultuous periods of my life. I knew I wanted out.. I wanted something more than my local high school and my hometown could offer me. I was dating a guy that in hindsight, was a better friend than boyfriend, and I don't think I felt inspired by.. ANYTHING.

1 year ago I was: Living with a guy that I constantly feared was cheating on me, and who in actuality, was.

5 minutes ago I was: Being asked what I thought sperm would do in a deep fryer.. don't ask.

5 snacks I enjoy: Brownies, donuts, nacho chips, chocolate cake, white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookies

5 songs I know all the words to: 'Everything to Everyone' - Everclear, 'Flagpole Sitta' - Harvey Danger, 'King for a Day' - Green Day, 'Who Will Save Your Soul' - Jewel, 'Semi Charmed Life' - Third Eye Blind

5 things I would do with 100 million dollars: Build a house, Pay off my Parent's mortgages, Buy the dogs I want to start my own lines, travel & INVEST!!!

5 places I would run away to: My Parent's Place, My Bed, Australia, A cabin in the mountains, Spain

5 things I would never wear: Microminis, Hair Extensions, Thong Bikinis, Sorel Winter Boots, Black Lipstick


5 favorite TV shows: Family Guy, Futurama, Clone High, Friends (why oh why, did sitcoms die???), The Simpsons

5 bad habits: Smoking, chatting for copious amounts of time, sweets, biting my nails and overindulging in the sauce.

5 biggest joys: Getting home after a long day and seeing how happy my dog is to see me, when a certain someone comes over, when you take a picture and it turns out perfectly, the first day off, having dinner made for me when I get home.

5 favorite toys: My PC, my dog, my cat, *giggle* Lil' Joe, and a boy!

5 fictional characters I would date: Prince Charming, Aladdin, Fred from Scooby Doo (if he weren't so hung up on that Daphne character), Prince Eric from 'The Little Mermaid', Roger Rabbit

Stress Leave: Day 1

I don't think I mentioned this earlier, but today is the first day of the mandatory stress leave my Regional Manager implemented after my breakdown on Friday. Instead of simply accepting my resignation, she'd prefer to troubleshoot this problem by giving me some time off and contemplating the idea of me transferring branches.

Tam isn't into the idea so much, because she's worried who she'll get to replace me. Her, Kyle, Princess, Jer and I went out to Pastaccio on Saturday and I told them what the conversation with my RM consisted of on Friday. The meal was awesome, and completely on the company, which was even better considering my recent penniless status after Frank failed to pay rent on time.

Anyway.. I think I need this, and it probably couldn't have come at a better time, since this is supposed to be a short week for me anyway. So instead of me working Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, I'll try to finagle those days and the weekend off so I can get some things straightened out in my life.

Man, was Friday embarrasing. After working in the Service industry for like 6 years I got a customer complaint that day because I just did my job, and what she complained about was neither abnormal in the line of work that I do, and it happened A MONTH AGO.

It was my personal last straw, and I tendered my resignation immediately when confronted with the 'coaching' form I was asked to fill out.

I'd never felt so worn out, and disillusioned, and upset and mad at the world, all at once. It was like I had no worth as an employee, and that they were willing to believe every word this woman said about me, and I thought to myself, "Anyone could do this.. any customer who felt we were in the least bit unfair could complain and make an employee's life hell for a day."

And that thought unnerved me.

So here I am, contemplating life, drinking coffee #1, at 2 in the afternoon, less than an hour after I woke up today, procrastinating as usual.

I need this.

Three Things

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Bridgit - Pretty Standard
2. Bree - Jayson, Ola and Corey are typically the only people who use it
3. B - Again, fairly standard, but I answer to it better than I do my actual name

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Being Lost - I have a great sense of direction, not knowing where I am would utterly terrify me
2. Dark water/Sharks - I think this is residual from watching Jaws when I was young.. not knowing what's under the surface is extremely unnerving for me.. I've never swam in the ocean
3. Betrayal at the hands of someone I care about

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Cigarettes
2. Caffeine
3. Sleep

Don't let that be a reflection on who I am.. or do.. I don't care.

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. A red turtleneck
2. Brown Slacks
3. My Fuzzy Dog Slippers

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS:
1. Everclear
2. Green Day
3. Our Lady Peace

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS:
1. Simply Irresistable - Robert Palmer
2. Everything to Everyone - Everclear
3. Flagpole Sitta - Harvey Danger

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A FRIENDSHIP:
1. Witty Banter
2. Understanding
3. Longevity

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE (in no particular order):
1. My dog and I perfect a dance routine to remixed version of 'Total Eclipse of the Heart' on my days off
2. I once rescued a baby squirrel that fell out of a tree and nursed it back to health
3. I have an insatiable sex drive

(Longtime readers of my blog will know the lie, since both truths have been mentioned)

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. Eyes
2. Smile
3. Arms

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Reading
2. Dogshows/My Dog
3. Surfing the Web

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO RIGHT NOW:
1. Learn another language (I was dabbling in Esperanto earlier today)
2. Be having drinks with a good friend
3. Having sex

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Spain
2. Australia
3. Someplacein South America

THREE KID'S NAMES YOU LIKE:
1. Olivia
2. Adele
3. Logan

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Learn another language, and speak it fluently
2. Write a book and have it published
3. Have sex under a waterfall

THREE WAYS YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY
1. I always climbed trees faster than all my friends
2. I blatantly announce to all my coworkers when I'm going to 'have a dump'
3. Sex is on my mind 24/7/365

THREE WAYS YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. I love playing with makeup
2. I'm a shoe-horse
3. I cry during romantic comedies/romances/sitcoms/Disney Cartoons

THREE RANDOM FACTS ABOUT MY CLOSET:
1. It houses a shoe collection that would have most men running for the hills, screaming 'She's too High Maintainence!!!'
2. My dog hides in there from the garbage truck on pickup days
3. 3/4 of it's contents are brown.. I have a penchant for brown clothing

THREE ITEMS IVE NEVER WORN BUT HAVENT TOSSED
1. A white studded tube top
2. A 'dog show outfit' my mom bought that got passed on to me
3. Really high cork heeled platforms with a rawhide lace that wraps around your ankles

THREE THINGS I WILL NEVER GET RID OF NO MATTER HOW UGLY THEY GET
1. My family ;)
2. The shoes my parent's bought me for my Sweet 16.. they're too small and sort of warped now, but I know Mom and Dad didn't have much money then, and I loved those shoes
3. The few friends who have stuck by me through everything :)

THREE ITEMS THAT PEOPLE WOULDN'T EXPECT TO FIND IN MY CLOSET
1. A tennis racket.. because I'm such a sporty person, right?
2. Spurs for horseback riding
3. Leather Pants

THREE ITEMS THAT MADE ME GO, OH LORD, WHAT WAS I THINKING
1. My Grade 8 picture
2. Emails from my Ex
3. The little green lingerie inspired top I bought in May... I'm too big and too flat for something like that

THREE THINGS I HAVE A SURPRISING NUMBER OF
1. Books
2. Male friends
3. Packages of steak in my freezer

THREE DOMINANT COLORS IN MY CLOSET
1. Brown
2. Red
3. Black

What's Up with me? I might ask you the same.

So last Saturday reigned supreme as the day marking the welcoming of my 22nd year. We all got dressed up in our Halloween finery and made way to Santannas for alcohol, dancing and really bad pickup lines. Krista blew me off with no explanation (and is apparently still holding the cold shoulder routine, although I'm confused as to why), so it was Ryan, Wayne, Tam, Corey and I.




I was a Substitute teacher, Tam a very tongue in cheek version of a Cereal (Serial) Killer, Ryan an Attack Dog trainer, Corey.. umm.. a gigantic dick (sorry Tam... it's fitting) and Wayne was Reptile from Mortal Kombat. Good times, and thankfully Wayne, Corey, Ryan and I were feeling no ill effects in the morning. The same could not be said for my fearless Leader who braved the trek to worship the Porcelain Gods.. All Night.

Poor thing.

And of course Saturday marked the day Tammy took possession of her new apartment in West Edmonton Village, despite Corey's remarks on the condition of the apartment and me dropping hints she and Jeremy could stay AS LONG AS THEY WANTED.

I miss Tam and Jer.

Got a new roommate though. His name is Frank and he hails from Sudbury originally, although has been living with his best friend and his girlfriend since February here in E town. Seems like a nice enough guy, and is actually willing to share personal background, so it looks promising. Although he took the TV and a cable connection in his room, so I'm not sure how much I'll see of him in upcoming days.

Fair enough though.. since Phil was a dear and fixed my machine for me a few days back, I've spent copious amounts of time online fiddling around and chatting with people, so I've not been great company either. Summer's starting to get the 'Mom-you're-neglecting-me' look again. Oh yeah.. and the cat has worms.. just had to throw that out there. ;) Anyway.. Frank seems like a decent fella, although he seems to enjoy his nightcaps, and knowing me, I never need much of a reason to enjoy one as well. Could pan out to be a bad thing knowing how addictive my personality is. Ahhh.. foreboding.

I'm really looking forward to Friday though, since I know he'll be heading Clareview-ish to go visit his buddy and get stoned. Likely on some of that class B Albertan cornfields weed that people here always call BC pot. Not that I'm becoming chronic again or anything like that... I just know how horribly not-BC this green really is, hailing from the Beautiful province myself.

A little giggle this morning when I missed my bus stop on Stony Plain and wandered down a back alley towards work. I passed the apartment block I've recently dubbed 'The Hole' for the vast amounts of our deadbeat, non-paying welfare clients it houses and see my ex-roommate Alex cleaning out the backseat of his Probe inside the fenced in parking area underneath it.

Moving up in the world, huh, Al? Good on ya buddy! Loser.

So as I mentioned I have a fully functioning PC and internet access again.. no more worrying about who at work will find out how often I blog and/or chat on company time (although Kyle's still ever so grateful for the Kool Aid, I know he'll never tell).

Wayne's been awesome as of late.. and I think he's really worried about what's happening between the two of us. Although I wish he'd stop... worrying is MY job, and no one should deprive me of my role. ;)

Things are good, though.. nice, lowkey and there's no pressure, which seems to be working brilliantly for us. I'm excited.. I need friends, but I don't need a boyfriend, although it's nice to have someone around for *ahem* 'companionship'.

Anywhoos.. I promised myself I'd call this an early night, since my buddy Corey from DC is thinking about moving to Edmonton and needs some assistance finding a place to live, and I figure the am is about the best time to talk to people. I need more hours in a day.. I think 28 or so would suffice. That's what I want for Christmas.

'Night.