Transference

I was reading this particularly interesting study this morning about transference in interpersonal relationships, and specifically in a romantic relationship.

The basic concept is that oftentimes in traumatic circumstances people will transfer details about the situation or person(s) involved and carry it forward. In a romantic relationship, the victim becomes involved with someone new and instead of attempting to understand the person they are with, the victims will choose instead to make the assumption that they are just like another person (in many instances, the aggressor in the past relationship) and consequently believe their new partner will feel and behave in ways that are similar to how that other person would feel/behave.

I wasn't aware of this term or theory, but I've often wondered about whether it's possible. Especially exiting a relationship where I often felt like I was being compared to someone else, or reacted to in a way that didn't seem entirely appropriate to the situation. There's so much comfort in knowing you aren't alone, that there's a perfect black and white term to describe it, and that it's not me or him -- it's just the human brain.