The Plague Marriage

I read today that Carmen and Dave (that'd be Electra and Navarro respectively) are splitting. I'm surprised. That's 3 years longer than I figured they'd stay together.

Although I suppose if she let him take their wedding invite pics of the two of them on an autopsy table, they almost should have worked out.

I was rifling through my magazine rack in the powder room (I'm opting to be a lady tonight) last night and I started flipping through an old issue of Cosmo where it features an article on celebrity marriages and why some thrive while others tank.

Some of the noted "thriving marriages"?:

- Richie Sambora and Heather Locklear (signed divorce papers in December '05 -- she's screwing David Spade, while he's out with another half of a formerly 'happy' couple.. see next)

- Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen (March 2005 they started proceedings, but put it off to attend couple's therapy.. reportedly she continued with the divorce when he started sending her death threats. She's boinking Richie Sambora, now)

- Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey (there's a laugh.. no one was surprised when they failed and filed back in November, least of all the dimwit who wrote the article, I'm sure.)

- Hilary Swank and Chad Lowe (January 2006. Granted, this one actually surprised me.. I have no derogatory remarks about it.)

- Paul McCartney and Heather Mills (May 2006. Linda was the love of his life, he should have mourned her for longer. Stella had it right.. Heather is a manipulator. Love how she DIDN'T sign a prenup!)

Apparently the only thing that makes a marriage "thriving" in Hollywood, is when the couple is actually still sleeping in the same bed.

Wow.

Way to get jaded about long term prospects, B.

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Addendum: After re-reading this I figured out a trend. None of the women took their husband's last names. There's some more food for thought.